I truly, with all of my heart, believe that this statement is true even if most all of the kids we have cared for won’t even remember us.  Hopefully we will be a feeling they carry with them of a place of love.  I believe we make a difference and provide a safe, loving home to all of the kids who come live with us and it matters.  For some it is just a couple of days, some a couple of years.  We are blessed to have them and have learned something from each and every one.
I will admit, as much as we love it and feel rewarded by doing it, it’s not all rainbows and unicorns.
Fostering isn’t just about loving a child in need.   It’s about working with “rules” (no haircuts, log every bump & scratch, dr visits for every cough, etc), working with social workers (sometimes great, sometimes super frustrating) and biological parents (who are often times not super happy you are taking care of their child and complain about the way they are being cared for).
Over the last 11 years and 54 kids we have come to know, we have had incredibly great experiences and some incredibly frustrating ones.
We have made the choice as the parents to open our home to kids who need a safe place to be while the adults work out their issues.  Unfortunately, this means our boys know about drugs and abuse and that sometimes people do horrible things to others.  They are too young to know these things, but they do because there is no other way to explain how a 6 week old baby is broken and needs to live with us for awhile.
But they are learning to care for these babies and be tender and sweet and they are learning that babies are a LOT of hard work.  There are times when they resent them, the jealousy rises and there are tears and drama.   I get it, it’s super hard to share your mom in such an intense way.  I can only hope that us fostering and these experiences, while tough while we are in the trenches (right now!!!!), will be looked back upon in a positive way and help my kids become more open and accepting of others who may be struggling.

For the last 9ish years we have made a point to try and have Family Dinner with Mary and Alice every week.  There have been times we haven’t (vacations, busy schedules, etc) but it is one of my favorite nights of the week.
The kids are family, we are family and there is always love, support, good conversations and delish food!
Last night as I was setting the table and waiting for Mary and Alice to show up, it really hit me how fortunate we are to have these two people in our family.
The kids argue like siblings, play like siblings, put up with each other as well as push each other’s buttons like siblings, but they also stand up for each other and can curl up on a beanbag and snuggle up to watch a movie.  Love.  We are truly fortunate for this connection in our lives.

I grew up with a great big brother.  We fought like typical siblings.  We had wrestling matches.  We called them B.B.R.F.s – Big Bad Restling Fights and when my parents banned them my brother would say “well they didn’t say anything about an “After Dinner Big Bad Restling Fight!” and it would start again.   I hate to admit, though, that my brother was bigger and stronger while I was scrappier and determined I just couldn’t overcome the 4 year age and size difference.  I often opted for the fake crying and would stick my tongue out at him while I was being comforted by my mother and he was being sent up the stairs for hurting his little sis.  Sorry about that, bro.
While we had our fights, we truly were friends (and still are!) and loved each other.
I see so much love between Erin and her brothers.  Yes, they fight like my brother and I did but there is also deep love.  When I dropped the boys off at school on Tuesday, Erin was a wreck.  She was tantruming and throwing toys and I finally pulled her close to me and asked when the issue was.  She said she wanted her boys back.  I told her they would be home soon, but I also missed them a ton when they were at school.
When we picked them up and we were driving home, she reached over and grabbed Levi’s hand.  Sweetest thing ever.  Erin is one lucky girl, she has three big brothers who love her so much.  I know they will always have her back.

I took Levi and Carlos with me to Wal-Mart the other day (yeah, don’t judge) and they were begging me for the Pick 3 Bucket of deep fried nastiness.  I’ve bought it before and passed it off as lunch/distraction as we strolled up and down the aisles.
We really try to make good choices when it comes to food and to teach the kids about healthy eating.  They are great eaters for the most part (minus one who is picky but getting better about trying new things) and I’m glad they jump for joy when we have lettuce and shrimp wraps w edamame.
When they asked for the Pick 3 Bucket, I put my foot down.  We had a healthy dinner planned so I told them if they wanted to have it, they had to spend their own money on it.  They each bought one, of course they couldn’t possibly share.  This was the case of their eyes were bigger than their stomachs.  They ate and ate and ate, then felt a little bad then ate a little more.  By the next day they each threw 2/3 bucket of sticky chicken, jo jos and popcorn chicken into the trash.  My job here is done.

If you asked me a month ago if I would be able to give an injection to someone, I would have probably doubted myself or said if it were an emergency.  I’m not a fan of needles.  But it turns out that I’m pretty good at giving a shot to someone else.   Maybe I should have been a nurse?
Every day is a learning experience as living with someone with Type 1 Diabetes is a full time job for the caretaker.  Our kids are all ok, no worries, but we have a T1 living with us and his care is a huge job.  Who knew!?
For daily care there are 8+ plus times/day to check blood sugars (and we are hyper vigilant and check if there is ANY question of him being low or acting out of the norm and 4-5 times/day to give injection.  Besides the stress of that and trying to keep this person’s blood sugars “within range”, we have to measure and calculate the carbs in what he eats and then try to guesstimate how much of each food he ate and the total carbs, then compensate for those carbs with insulin injections.  With all the things we have to do, the most stressful time is at night.  We check him before he goes to bed, before we go to bed and at 3am.  If he’s low in any way, he gets to have juice and we wait for 15 minutes and check him again.  Repeat if necessary.
This is a serious, life long condition that many don’t understand.  I’ve joined a Facebook page of Parents of T1 kids and the emotions run high, the parents are completely stressed out (wouldn’t you be if you had to constantly monitor, adjust and document your child’s health?) but it’s wonderful the way they embrace all my “newbie” questions and offer up support.
Anyhow, that’s what’s keeping us busy these days, we are exhausted but feel like we are starting to understand this a little and gaining confidence all the time!

 Ever since Erin got her ear tubes in, the monthly ear infections stopped.  The heavens opened up, the angels sang and the ear infections and non-stop antibiotics stopped.
Fast forward to a couple of months ago.  We had the docs look to see how the tubes were doing, one was out of the ear canal the other in place.  A week later…ear infection.  A couple weeks after run of  antibiotics, another…repeat four times.  In for a consult at Children’s and they confirmed that she needs a new set of tubes and additionally her adnoids and possibly her tonsils removed.

If she has to have her tonsils out, she will have to spend the night in the hospital.
A mom never wants to see her baby in pain, never wants to have them go into surgery (even minor) but we know this is best for her in the long run.
Send up your healing thoughts and prayers on Jan 29th for our girl.  Fingers crossed it will help stop the ear infections and our sweet girl will be on the mend.

 Christmas morning at Nana and Papa’s is always a highlight.  The boys spend lots of time pre-Christmas talking with the grandparents so they are sure they know what’s top on their lists.  (I love that Nana and Papa always deliver, too!)
There are always treats and gifts and the spirit of Christmas.  These kids LOVE their grandparents and every minute they get to spend with them.

 It was a crazy Christmas this year, just with the sheer number of kids in our home.  Count them…SIX!  The bigger boys struggled with the “do we believe or not believe” and the Littles were so wrapped up in the magic it was infectious.
There was less “stuff” and more intentional time and activities.  That felt right for us.
Here are a few pics of our morning.